Celebrating International Women's Day

Lets Celebrate International Women's Day By:
Being who we are,

Living a dignified life, free from the fear of persecution & violence,

Not having to bow down to anything or anyone,

Enjoying the freedom of expression and the right to practice/not practice religion,

Making decisions about our own lives and bodies,

Controlling our own properties and incomes,

Having the strength to walk out of abusive relationships,

Reaching for the stars and helping each other get there!

*****

P.S. Found the quote in the photograph in Facebook, could not trace the author, loved it and wanted to share it with you.

P.P.S. Had to draw a sari clad woman flying on a broomstick, I am no artist as my cartoon shows clearly. This is just for fun!

P.P.P.S. Most comrades (men) understand the need for this day to spread awareness on women's issues. We women salute you and welcome you in our struggle. We dearly need your support.

P.P.P.P.S. The leftover men out there, yes you should also have a men's day (why don't you get organised and start something?), yes we know there are some women out there who twist the laws to their own advantages. Your brother's friend's uncle's distant cousin's friend's friend has had a bad experience. We empathise. Now start counting how many women you know who have had horrible experiences. Give us a break, will ya? You men have been making, breaking,  twisting laws for centuries and then a couple of  progressive laws like the Domestic Violence Act in India and the divorce laws in the West come (and not even implemented properly) and you men cannot stop cribbing! And you say we women are cry babies....

P.P.P.P.P.S. Lets spread the word, share this far and wide please!

Have A Happy Val Day

Happy Val Day dear friends.

This lavender filled,

little felt heart

was given to me

last Christmas

by a little girl called Olivia :-)

Christmas Tree....

 This year we settled for a tiny tree. Since it was so tiny that we could not find any decorations for it, so Indranil decided to make some. I have some origami papers given by my aunt about 20 years back. Initially I tried doing origami, but it was so intricate and demanded such concentration that I soon lost patience and interest. But I loved the papers and preserved them lovingly and also happened to bring them with me to the UK. Indranil apparently loved doing origami as a kid but never got the right kind of paper for his creations. So it was like duck taking to water. Indranil and the papers created magic! Enjoy the photos, most of them are taken by our friend Anurita with her superb camera.

Our teeny weeny tiny tree....

Tree next to the fire place...

|Origami decorations

A flower for the tree...

A basket...we had heard that |Santa was now a days leaving goodies in baskets as well :) So we were ready for him....

Deft fingers at work...

And a star is born....

Yields of four hours of hard work!

Kali Pujo and Diwali Greetings...

It must be early evening in India now. It is Kali Pujo in Kolkata today and in North India choti diwali. If you want to know more about these festivals, check out here. Houses would be decorated with diyas and candles, the enthusiastic must have started with the fire crackers. Early evening  is the time of the kids and the crackers are mostly kiddish like phool jhuri.  As the evening progresses adults emerge with their stock of rockets and tubris. Some over enthusiastic people even make their own crackers.The sound of crackers become deafening and the air is thick with acid smell. Sometimes a tubri goes upto three stories, people would rush to their windows to watch the spectacle, the rockets would up in the sky and create their own magic.

The homes look bright and beautiful with all those fairy lights and the aromas of rich food waft around, Bengali households are also stocking up for Bhaiphota/Bhai Duj just two days away, so malpoas and narkol narus (home made sweets) are being prepared in earnest.  The kids are usually super excited because of the crackers, also they get to wear last of the new pujo clothes, carefully preserved for this last day of festivities. The elders are watching the kali pujo porikroma  (visiting the various pandals) on television, while some of the pious Bengalis fast till midnight for the kali pujo, while some other worship laskmi and ganesh for prosperity. The pujo pandals are all lighted up, each competing with the other to make their kali protima look as grotesque and fearsome as possible.  After a hectic day of business, the markets close down, the shopkeepers leave discussing how good the business was compared to last year.

For the non Bengalis this day is a runner up for diwali, so it is equally exciting.

Here is wishing you a great kali pujo and diwali.
In the words of my friend Anu  "As much as we enjoy the fireworks, let's also keep in mind the child labour, environmental damage, petrified animals and the amount of money that is blown up into smoke in the process. Let us celebrate Diwali in it's true essence and put away our insensitivities, and teach our children the real meaning of this festival of lights. Happy Diwali."  

My sentiments exactly, could not agree more with her, nor could I put it in better words. Have a safe and happy celebration!

Celebrating our first anniversary....

We celebrated our first marriage anniversary on the 10th of this month. Its unbelievable how quickly this year passed....we spent the day together... after a really long time shopped till we dropped....spent some happy hours browsing in some lovely shops...had great food....gave each other interesting gifts.. received plenty of good wishes...got wet some (it was a rainy day in Oxford)... met really friendly cab drivers....discovered lovely pink Champagne...

Here's to many, many more years of togetherness....

Fancy lights...

Some fancy lights that I had bought for our terrace in Delhi. They are all packed up in some carton in Kolkata. I miss these lights, when we used to light them at night, the terrace used to look magical. These lights had set the mood for our parties many a times. The photos were taken by Anubha.

Happy Valentine's Day :)

Love is a promise, love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it  disappear. John Lennon

Christmas Celebrations...

We went to celebrate our first Christmas here in the UK with friends in Milton Keynes. K and A are a lovely and warm couple and have a great home and our celebration extended to well over 4 days. Reaching on the Christmas Eve, we first saw 3 Idiots. On the Christmas day we had a feast for lunch. The traditional turkey with cranberry sauce, Brussels sprouts with bacon, warm bread and potatoes and then we had some yummy chicken biriyani cooked Andhra style.  Some other friends of theirs had come over... after stuffing ourselves at lunch we all sang songs. Yes even me. Thankfully it was karaoke with music to bolster most of our tuneless singing. Then it was time for some card games, involving good natured cheating, ribbing and a lot of laughter.

On Boxing Day we went to check out the sales. But back home it was time for some more yummy food and games. The next day  was went along the same lines-- good food, laughter and games, oh yes we also saw the movie Rocket Singh: The Salesman of the Year.

Could not capture the fun, but some glimpses of the good food we had.

Hope you guys also had an enjoyable Christmas too.

Enjoy the rains....

Right now I feel like Stephane Meyer's Twilight series hero Edward and his family. No no am not in the mood to suck blood. Another reason. Ask me why. Well Edward was a dracula and his family obviously consisted of father, mother and sibling draculas and whenever it rained they would play basketball. Well am at all into basketball but I sure love the rain. And man it is raining in such a sexy way in Kolkata right now.

I have been in a meeting continously today and the yesterday. By the time I was done today my brain was saturated, head was buzzing ( could literally hear the sound), temples were throbbing and for some reason I was famished. Went out to get a snack, it was all cloudy. While coming back it started to rain. Lovely. Though I didnt get the chance to get wet, the cool breeze, the cloudy sky and the fat rain drops refreshed my mind, cleared my head and filled me with a disproportionate sense of well being. I am happy to be alive and sitting here in front of my computer, the window is open and I can see and hear the rain. I so love this.

Yesterday Indranil was telling me that whenever it rains I write a blog post on it. Maybe I do-- I love the rains and find it a very soul cleasening and life giving process. The sounds remain long after the actual rain has stopped, trees look refreshed and green, earth becomes soft and the weather is so much more better.

Season's Greetings

New year is almost here, just two days to go. Time for season's greetings and new year cards.

When I was a kid, my father used to get loads of greetings cards and in my teenage so did I. In school days, exchanging cards was a big thing. I remember we used to throng Archies and other card shops, some used to creat these cards.

Even after school was out, we used to post greetings cards to each other. The internet came and sending paper cards became passe. E cards became the rage. Inboxes used to look festive if not anything else. Then sms greeting became popular. Smses are still doing the rounds.

I am an old fashioned girl and I still prefer the cards arriving via the post. Ah the thrill of opening an envelope and finding a greeting from a old friend. And it gets better if there is a letter or at least a note tucked in.

I must confess that I have also stopped sending cards to friends. My friends hardly ever used to respond back so I lost interest. But I still send e cards. I find smses very inadequate and in sufficient.

How are you planning on wishing happy new year to your friends this year?

The Holidays...

I saw this movie The Holidays onWednesday night at HBO. It was a lovely movie, and all the more special because after a really long time, I was comfy in front of our television set in home with my Jaipur quilt and a cup of green tea. It is a quintessential Christmasy feel-good movie and I simply loved it. I fell in love with some of the dailouges and must share them with you.

Iris: Because you're hoping you're wrong. And every time she does something that tells you she's no good, you ignore it. And every time she comes through and suprises you, she wins you over, and you lose that argument with yourself, that she's not for you.
Miles: Exactly, and on top of that there's the old standby, I can't believe a girl like that would actually be with a guy like me.

Arthur Abbott: Iris, in the movies we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason you are behaving like the best friend.
Iris: You're so right. You're supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god's sake! Arthur, I've been going to a therapist for three years, and she's never explained things to me that well. That was brilliant. Brutal, but brilliant.

Iris: Shush. You broke my heart. And you acted like somehow it was my fault, my misunderstanding, and I was too in love with you to ever be mad at you, so I just punished myself! For years! But you waltzing in here on my lovely Christmas holiday, and telling me that you don't want to lose me whilst you're about to get MARRIED, somehow newly entitles me to say, it's over. This - This twisted, toxic THING between us, is finally finished! I'm miraculously done being in love with you! Ha! I've got a life to start living. [Picks up Jasper's jacket, walking to the door]

Iris: I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said "Journeys end in lovers meeting." What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night. And then, there's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. Its called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone? We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly loved that man for over three miserable years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas', the worst Birthday's, New Years Eve's brought in by tears and valium. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back. Oh god, just the sight of him! Heart pounding! Throat thickening! Absolutely can't swallow! All the usual symptoms.


Iris: I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible. And how it can actually ache in places you didn't know you had inside you. And it doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends... you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. And how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you'll go somewhere new. And you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade.

For all those friends who feel that they are the only ones who are lonely and sad during the festivities, remember we all do go through it at some point. Cheer up now.

Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve always brings to my mind Christmas Carol. Funny how one book can shape your ideas about a day or an event or as in this case a festival. We had to read an extract of Christmas Carol in school. Even now I remember the trukey and apple sauce that the Cratchit family had for Christmas Eve dinner.

When I was a kid, my dad used to bring home a toy Christmas tree and decorate it for me. But that was on the 25th. 24th has pretty much always been a normal day for me.

The year I spent Christmas in Toronto, I went with my Philipina friend to her cousin's house for dinner. The dinner was good and different with whole telapia fish baked apart from other food. The funny part of that dinner was that there everyone thought I was half Philipina or I knew Tagalog, hence they are were all talking to me in Tagalog. After sometime I stopped clarifying to people that I do not understand Tagalog and just sat there, pretending to understand every bit of conversation. Much to my surprise my friend also started to speak to me in Tagalog. So people it is highly unjust to blame Bongs to speak in Bengali when we gather, every lingual group in the world does that I believe. Anyways to get back, it was a pretty different experiece to be with a group of people who were speaking in a foreign language. That day I realised how much our facial and hand gestures help in our communication.

After the dinner, we had picked up our Russian friend, (for whom Christmas is in January, hence she was not doing anything special) and went to the church for midnight mass. Going to the mass was also a pretty interesting experience. While going for dinner we had taken for a cab. Now while we were waiting for the bus on our way to the chruch, a cab slowed down and the cabbie recognised me. I asked for a ride and he agreed. Yes I have managed to get a free ride from a cab. The interesting part does not end there. The cabbie was South Asian and he started talking to me. He claimed to be from India, when I asked him where he is from, he said rather sheepishly "Rawalpindi". Later a Pakistani friend told me that some Pakistanis in Toronto were so ashamed of President's rule in Pakistan that they claimed to be Indians! Now wne I think back I have always met very nice Pakistani people in Canada and they were always more friendly and warm than their Indian counterparts.

Let me end on this warm friendship note. Merry Chritsmas folks!

Obama won...

Obama's winning seems like the long waited brightest piece of good news in the world right now. Good for the man and US of A. I am sure the world would benefit from his presidency.

But I have been really stunned the way Indians have been going on about it. I know many Indians who have been following this election and the campaign really closely and fanatically. My Indian friends in US following it closely makes sense but Indians in India being so super enthusiastic eludes me completely. As a student of political science I should be happy to see this high level of excitement and involvement in the political process. Or was it just fan following of the charming man Obama is projected as? I only wish Indians were this involved in their own elections and actually went to vote. When will the educated Indians feel the same way about elections in India?

Durga Pujo in New Delhi 2008

Durga Pujo 2008, New Delhi. Durga pujo is the most important celebration of the bengalis. Most important is the point to be noted since we have a festival or two every month. There is a saying in bengali "baro maash ee tero parbon" (thirteen festivals in twelve months) and out of all these festivals durga pujo is the most grandest. We believe that ma durga is coming to visit her parents. She comes on sasthi or the sixth day and brings along her four children. On the tenth day she goes home with her children. We dunk those beautiful idols which are made over a period of six months in the tributary and feel sad and forlon till the next year when ma comes to visit us again.
Preparation of the festival begins just as soon as the current one ends. On rakhi purnima potters go to pick up clay from Hoogly's bank which is what Ganga is called in Bengal and start the work of creating these idols.
Bengalis give gifts (read new clothes) to families and friends before the pujo. The norm is that during the pujo days from sasti to dashomi everyone wears new clothes, a fresh change for each part of the day and also new shoes. So a very common sight in Kolkata during these days are people wearing new clothes and limping badly :)

Saptami or the seventh day of the nine auspicious days...second day of Bengali durga pujo. This photograph is taken in Kashmiri Gate pujo which is in old Delhi. This year the pujo celebrated 99th year and is gearing up for its 100th year celebration next year. This pujo is held in the compound of a school building. They distribute khichuri and payash in the afternoon as bhog which is very delicious. Also you get Kolkata style (read Bijali Grill) type biriyani and chap in the eating stalls which is just awesome.

C.R. Park B Block pujo on ashtami or eighth day morning when anjali is going on. The crowd gather are giving anjali. Bengalis fast in the morning, wear new clothes and come and offer group prayer to ma durga with flowers. The prayer is done three times with flowers accompanied by mantra and the last time just the mantra. Then they eat prasad and break their fast. Anjalis start from 9/9.30 in the morning and go on till mid morning. Anjalis happen from sasthi till dashami or the tenth day morning.
Magic show going on in B block pujo. In Delhi cultural functions are held. The cultural functions used to start from panchami or the fifth day and almost everyone get chance. So the on the fifth day kids would perform, antaksharis would be held etc. Then with the beginning of serious celebrations artists from all over the country espcially Kolkata and sometimes even Bangladesh would be invited. Early slots were not so famous ones but as nights progressed famous artisits statrted performing. I remember one pujo maybe 2002 or 2003, my cousins and me, we chased Usha Uttuph all over pandals in Delhi. I have heard bands like Indian ocean and Euphoria in pujo pandals. But over the years due to security reasons organizers are being forced to cut down on these and not bring in high profile artisits to performance.

Announcement of some of the fun things happening during pujo days in B block.

Greater Khailash 2 durga pujo during asthami/eighth day evening aarati.

Chandelier in the GK 2 pujo pandal.

C R Park B block again. Ma durga with her two children Lakshmi-- the goddess of wealth and Kartik-- the god of good looks. Lakshmi is accompanied by her special pet owl and kartik with peacock.

Ma with other two children Saraswati-- the goddess of knowledge and Ganesh-- the god of wisdome. Saraswati is accompanied by her special pet swan while ganesh has his mouse.

Preparation of Sandhipujo. This is the time when we believe that Ma had killed ashur or demon and triumphed over evil. Ma has ten hands and each hand holds a special weapon and she is helped in her fight by her special pet the lion.

Mounted police on asthami night to control crown. But this year because the pujo dates fell on weekdays and also due to bomb scare the crowd was not that thick.

Inside of the B block pujo tent.

Mighty Celebrations....

Flower power: This bunch of flowers from Sapphire impressed a whole cross section of women- me, my mother, my roomies Anubha and Jayshree, office friends Aparna and Rekha, one of my best friends Angira and my cousin sisters. Dont think left anyone else out of the list. We women are so silly.

This cake came for my cousin sister, my bro-in-law and me, a week ago from my aunt and uncle. It was a group birthday celebration at Delhi Gymkhana Club with loads of food. The cake was yummy. The little chipped portion is courtesy Shubham, who did it all too swiftly before his parents could react. Tinku is the me in the cake.


My niece Amrita and nephew Subham more excited with the cake! than the birthday celebrating adults. Amrita valiantly trying to stave off Shubham from wrecking further damage to the cake.

29th September midnight. Our terrace...Anubha and Jayshree and this gooey cake. In case you are wondering gentle is my nickname for my gentle and ladylike nature.

Aparna, Rekha and me attacking this ice cream on my birthday afternoon.

The orange bunch was given by Rekha.

There were two more cakes, one got in office by Rekha and Aparna and the other in the evening in my cousin's house in C.R. Park, in the excitement of the birthday celebration we forgot to click photos.